So, I now play a novice bard (Yay?), because I've always wanted to get into the roleplay that they're able to create, but I've had songs lying around forever to post here. I'll pop off a few at a time. (= The hardest part, honestly, is trying to read my own handwriting.

The first time this was performed, it was done so with some great usage of ACT and the like with my WM, and I don't have logs. \= Anyway, the only version I have is filled with his accent, so jus'try an'gnore'it. Er, you know what I mean. The chorus is kinda . . . eh. I was younger, that's my excuse. (=

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"Hay, now," as performed by Wulfman Dronger

There was a man; I swear't's true,
as honest as I stan'fore you.
This poor fellow was jus'so blue
an'couldnae take no more.

What all caused it, care not t'think,
disturbing'nough t'raise a stink.
Hells, 'nough t'drive good men t'drink
an'pass out onna floor.

An'a hey-dee-dee
ho-di-di
An'y'ne'er would've thunk.
A-hoo-doo-doo
Ra-ha-ha
All'caus'e'as quite drunk.

An'so, tipsy wit'drink was'e,
ale sloshin'round internally,
his thoughts, they raced wit'gigglin'glee
as'e stumbled out th'door.

"Alone t'night? Never!" cried he,
"I know I'll find some company,
a lass or two, or mayhap three!"
Drunked did dream four more.

An'a hey-dee-dee
ho-di-di
Drunkin'an'not thinkin'.
A-hoo-doo-doo
Ra-ha-ha
Enterin'th'wrong buildin'.

An'so, inside, wha'did'e find?
Woman, said'is b'sotted mind.
Eyes blurred, unsure. 'e paid no mind
as long as'e was able.

His thoughts, nae dark. 'ere's's luck!
Th'noise woke hens that all did cluck.
Th'two, they shared a right good . . . conversation.
At least, tha's what'm told.

An'a hey-dee-dee
ho-di-di
Wouldn't y'know, o'course.
A-whoo-hoo-hoo
La-de-da
Woke up wi'is horse.

An'so, m'lads, th'meanin's clear,
'sall laid out'fore y'ere.
Don'overdo th'ale an'beer,
scotch, whiskey, rum, an'wine.

For when intox, anythin's a lass,
maybe not th'same race or class.
People'll know you're just a'donkey,
iffn you're caught with "friends" equine.